The end of the road? Not nearly. Is there really a road that ends? In the literal sense, yes, there are a lot of dead-end roads and in a way, death is like that, however, the dead’s energy continues to vibrate through the world, making it as if the road just continued through a dimension we in which our human bodies just can’t appreciate. 

It has been a long time since I have written in this space. This space that I created for Kayla and me to share us navigating our lives, finding peace in our bodies, and exploring the world. Our last shared writings were when we moved to Albuquerque, but everything went silent, since we were navigating so much with her seizures, next moves, and the global grief from the genocide that was occurring on our screens in Gaza, that made our story feel inconsequential. We both withdrew and looked inward, we focused on her health and hopes for her independence and I sought more education to better support her as the world continued to change.

This year changed every idea, plan or dream I ever had. If you are close to me, you know that my world stopped and the trajectory of my life changed on July 22, 2025. I will never have the vocabulary or the poetry to adequately describe the magnitude of the grief that I will carry losing Kayla. In healthcare, we learn about death from the dying, from Kübler-Ross, indicating the stages that occur for those facing death, but there is no real education for those who are left earthside. I am still what I will consider early in my grief but will share any insights that I can to help those navigate these places, to better council or show up for the grievers. I am still trying to find words on what kept me going in this darkness, but like Trampled by Turtles sang, “Love, and love, and nothing else,” kept me going. 

I don’t have any resolutions for 2026, other than self-love and continued sharing of Kayla, through my eyes and through the few pieces of writing that I found of hers. Last year my resolutions were to keep Kayla health after her major surgery and support her through navigating college, both of which were successful over the spring. She then got to go to her beloved “Camp Enchantment” over the first week of June, then in mid-July, join me in Washington, DC. A week later after returning from her and her friend independently exploring a large city while I was in conference, any semblance that we have one iota of control in this world was stolen in a second, by a careless driver, indescribably close to home. 

Putting this into the world, over and over again, is like pulling off the band-aide each time, on a wound that just won’t stop bleeding, there is no real way to cauterize the wound, but to expose it to the world, so maybe there is a collective healing. Every day I sit in the knowledge that Kayla is no longer physically in the world, that her vessel, which was strong and capable enough to fight, through a brain tumor diagnosis at 4 years old along with many related sequalae, epilepsy and abnormal bone growth, was not strong enough to survive a car. Kayla simply existing, was a reminder that she was a walking, talking, living miracle, an example of bravery, advocacy, good medicine and people that truly care. A piece of me wants to walk you through that day, but I am not sure I am ready to share that much, yet, but I know that there is powering in narrative and could help someone, someday, so I will get there in time. I just know that Kayla was loved and cared for her in her last moments, and her body was treated with respect and dignity. Those last moments with her physical form where a reminder that life is more than just a body, it is what is within, the energy and essence that moves the world. 

Although Kayla physically left, her energy remained, remained to inspire change. Her story created a thread of connection, the degree of separation that tragedy is closer than you realize. The public became aware that the laws and infrastructure in this city did not offer the protections or dignity that would have been assumed, the most vulnerable risked their lives everyday using the streets and crossings, while drivers were nearly immune from any fault unless they were egregiously breaking the law. This realization cultivated an energy in me to ask for better, elected officials and the public agreed, leading to changing a traffic code that was not changed in 51 years. I will expand more on how this happened, in another essay.

Going into 2026, I want to continue to keep Kayla alive. In these spaces, it will mostly be through my memories of her, the notes from her medical journey, and the changes that she inspired to save future lives. I will also be starting another site, “The Kayla Project: Safer Together,” which is how we intend to keep her legacy and dream of “making the world a better place” a reality. This site will have more evidence-based research around safety, upcoming advocacy opportunities and eventually a scholarship application for those who have innovative ideas to improve safety. I will update and link the two sites, this one providing more of a window into living, me navigating grief, the amazing power of Kayla, while the other will be safety and advocacy focused. In the world, I will keep her alive by continuing to be kind and compassionate, seeking safety and equity for everyone. I hope you will join me on this journey.

Finally, I will keep the name “Two Gals on the Road,” because I feel like she will continue to be on this journey with me.